I have, as many of us do, many tangled feelings of The Great Quarantining. Most people I know are brewing a sense of anxiety and agitation. They’re justifiably nervous, bored, uncertain, scared, panicky… a whole gamut of discomforts slowly simmering.
I’ve never felt more calm.
Of course, I have worries about my job (or lack thereof now…) I worry about how to pay my bills, I worry about my contacts and skills eroding, I worry about drifting from friends.
But I feel like I’m floating, weightless and serene. I see things without background noise when I take daily solitary walks. I feel OK. I’m not lonely.
The days are starting to be beautiful again, despite the invisible threat that may be carried in the wind, by the person next to you, by anything and everything you touch. The waves are sparkling and the blossoms are full and puffy in their effervescent, possibly contaminated beauty.
Such a shame to let this too pass by, so I walk. I stray by myself, I watch as people gradually start to move around with their faces covered. I see reckless people, I see careful people. I see a time that will not be forgotten in history.
I’m excited to watch this once in a generation event unfold — the fissures in our late stage capitalist society are turning into fractures that are hard to ignore. The weight of our society is on the shoulders of people who have held us up for too little too long. If they are essential, then why have we treated them so horribly?
Which way will it all go? It’s too early to tell, even though it feels like an eternity already.